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The perfect status update

a smartphone showing Facebook status
If you’ve got Facebook status anxiety, here are our dos and don’ts for the perfect update.

Whether you want to say ‘Happy Christmas’ or brag about your summer hols, the perfect Facebook status shares interesting info, mixed with a hint of whimsy, and all wrapped up in one snappy sentence. If you’ve got status anxiety, here are our dos and don’ts for the perfect update.

Don’t create a personal brand: Just by having a Facebook page, you’re crafting your image to a certain extent, but try not to manipulate the way others think about you. An obvious example is the ‘Isn’t my life glamorous?’ post, accompanied by pictures of you doing the duck-face in exotic locations.

Don’t brag: Probably the most annoying example is the ‘backdoor brag’, like: ‘I got whistled at three times on the way home from work—men are such animals’. Yeah, you poor thing.

Please don’t fish for ‘likes’: Don’t put up a post hoping to get lots of likes. Facebook won’t un-lonely you, but real people can.

Please, please don’t share private moments: Like, ‘Wow I have the best hubby, he got up early, looked after the kids, gave me a huge sloppy kiss and made me breakfast in bed’. Put it in a card, not on Facebook.

Do share good news: Sharing good news is not the same as bragging. There’s nothing wrong with being positive about yourself. The difference is your motivation. ‘I got a job, I’m so stoked!’ is sharing good news. ‘Out of 100 applicants and after three job interviews, I was chosen for my dream job’ may be more about image crafting.

Do inform: A good status is informative and interesting for the reader, not just for you. Most people are your Facebook friends because they would love to know about significant events in your life. But probably only your mum cares that you stubbed your toe.

Do share funny moments: Do make your friends’ days a little better by posting an entertaining status that will make them smile.