Issue 17 – Small Groups—A Beginner’s Guide

 

Dear Wes

You asked for some tips on small groups—because you can’t get people to buy into them.

Churches have struggled with small groups for decades—and to some extent, the smaller the church the bigger the struggle.

Large churches generally do small groups well because someone on staff drives them—indeed, small groups may be their sole focus in the church. Medium sized churches also tend do small groups well because there’s usually someone on leadership who can give them a lot of time and energy. Many smaller churches struggle with small groups because they’re often co-ordinated by volunteers who don’t have the time or skill to champion them. But whatever the church size, small groups are as big a challenge today as when I first led them in the early 80s.

Why have Small Groups?

We have small groups because, as Acts 2.46 hints, they’re the best way to grow Christians to full maturity.

With good small groups, a church can grow indefinitely without adding to the pastor’s pastoral workload—without small groups, one pastor can only care for 60-80 people. Well-run small groups bring direction and unity, facilitate ‘hands on’ training of new leaders, and help people in any sized church develop intimate relationships. And it’s these relationships that close the church’s back door more than anything else we do—just as a friend with 2000 on Sunday says his more than 100 adult small groups have shut his back door completely. Whoever comes to his church … stays—and you can’t help growing a church when that happens!

Indeed, Rick Warren says, ‘Small groups are the most effective way of closing the back door of your church. We never worry about losing people who are connected to a small group. We know that they have been effectively assimilated.’ And he also says, ‘Relationships are the glue that holds a church together. Friendships are the key to retaining members.’

Small groups, as the Acts 2 church demonstrated, are important because they’re God’s idea of how people should connect with one another, care for one another, and grow in faith together.

Some common Small Group challenges

NZ churches struggle with small groups for many reasons.

Some find their people are so busy it’s hard to fit another ‘meeting’ in. Some maturer Christians feel they’re doing fine as they are and don’t see the need for the intimate relationships that come with small groups. Many people resist joining small groups because of bad experiences with them.

Some give them away because they’re boring and lack direction or vision. Or small group meetings become very long and drift all over the place. Or groups become comfortable and inward looking. Or become a traditional Bible Study or Prayer Meeting rather than a relationally based group. Or give people head knowledge without applying it. Or people’s prayers for one another lack direction or discernment. Or the groups become meeting-focused rather than focusing on life-changing relationships. Or people with agendas dominate the group. Or leaders think they have to run the whole thing. And so on, in a list of bad experiences that is almost endless.

Small groups are a challenge—but when we face the challenges and work through them, the pay-off for the church is ‘out of this world’ (Acts 2.46b – 47a)!

Getting started—or restarted—with Small Groups

If you look at p.4 of World Vision Leadership Letter 167 (which you’ll find by clicking on the link below our Salvation Army Leadership Letters), you’ll see that one pastor friend (when we were still experimenting with small groups in a big way) took 15 years to steer his church through some unbelievable minefields till, helped by a family’s sickness, they began to discover what small groups are about.

Recently, another pastor friend had a much happier run—and in 12 months moved from having no small groups to having four, with a fifth one on the way. Here are the notes he sent me summarising their story.

• Over coffee after the morning service, and whenever we were talking to people, we would take the opportunity to speak up the importance of life-groups (cell) and just how they can help.
• After doing this for 4-5 weeks, we began mentioning that the church leadership had discussed the importance of life-groups and are planning on starting them; this was done at different times throughout the service, i.e. during announcements, in the message, in the welcome, etc. etc.
• This was the build up towards Christmas [of 2005] and the holidays (just happened to be our timing but not planned).
• Early Feb 06, we again reinforced the importance of life-groups in the service and used scripture to give the reason why; Acts 2.42-47 says, ‘… they broke bread in their homes…’ stressing how it was a part of the early church life, as well as the combined celebration time in the Temple.
• We announced that we would be running a training series for those who were thinking of leading a life-group, but this was not a commitment but just a come-and-see and pray/try.
• This ran for five weeks; I led the first, and then each night a different person had a turn at leading the life-group; At the end of each night we would then discuss/critique our leading style, i.e. good points and areas that could be looked at for improvement.
• We then had a relaxed/social night meal and I asked for those who would like to lead or host a life-group, the names were noted and then we agreed on starting dates and times.
• The leaders, hosts, times etc. were then announced to the church during the Sunday worship, with again stressing the scriptural importance of being involved in a life-group.
• And bingo they started. The groups run at their respective times to suit each group. I met with the group leaders during the year individually and then together to review and ask if they are keen to continue leading.

Note two things. First, this pastor used Jesus’ method of modelling what he taught, giving his disciples practice runs and discussing with them how it had all gone—and he’s repeating leadership training this year as they gear up for more groups with 40 Days of Purpose. And second, this pastor became a small group ‘champion’—enthusiastically championing small groups with people in general and at the church services in particular. And whether it’s the pastor or someone else, every church needs a small group champion if they’re to ‘make the cut’ with small groups. My friend with his 100+ groups has his champion, and this second church has a champion—the pastor!

When you use Jesus’ method—and get a champion driving the small group cause … you’ve got to win!

Some common questions about Small Groups

Here are some of the most common questions people ask about small groups.

1. How do we start, restart, or refocus Small Groups?

You can start small groups in different ways—start them from scratch without a focal point, start them from scratch with a focal point like 40 Days of Purpose, or use 40 Days to lift your small groups to a new level which you’ll factor in after it has finished. But whether with or without a focal point, you must have the strong focus, ‘marketing’, and intentionality of the above pastor when he started small groups from scratch.

Starting the way he did, preparing his leaders and people and hosts, you’ve simply got to win!

2. How often should Small Groups meet?

Small groups should ideally meet weekly, with an occasional night off for special things—although fortnightly will capture most of the dynamics that make small groups effective. In rural areas, groups may be suspended briefly during calving, lambing, or harvesting; but they should resume as soon as the peak of these seasonal events has passed.

In the very different world of the NT, the first Christians met in each other’s homes daily (Acts 2.46 NKJV, NRSV, ESV, etc)—as well as at the larger temple gatherings. But with our work environment, etc, that’s not possible today.

However, the more frequently we meet, the more we will experience the dynamics of the Acts 2 church—with its stunning impact on the community (v.43), and its unbelievable growth (v.47b). Weekly to fortnightly seems to fit the NT model fairly well.

3. What should we do when we meet?

In the slow-paced world of the NT, the first Christians could take their time at the temple and in each other’s homes; and in our very different situation, we’ll get most out of our groups if we build in ‘having a cuppa’, sharing our journeys, and worshipping God together—our rough equivalent of Acts 2.46-47a.

For over a decade, my friend’s 100+ groups have built their time together around the Four ‘W’s—but as a framework to guide them, not a cage to imprison them!

They begin with a Welcome and an intentional icebreaker to help them learn about each other in a non-threatening way. They move to Worship—when they praise God, thank him for his many blessings (including some perhaps from the icebreaker), and maybe pray for one another. Then they come to the Word, when (in their case) they usually talk about the Sunday message and how they can live it out in their daily lives. Finally, to make sure they’re outwardly focused on Witness, they pray for the three or more people they’re each trying to introduce to Jesus—and they plan events to include them. Then they finish with a cuppa and go home.

4. What material should we use?

Unless there’s a special focus, my friend’s 100+ groups use the Sunday message—including when it’s on themes like 40 Days of Purpose; so each leader just has a very brief discussion guide based on the message.

But with the advent of the Internet, there are many other resources available today—from Willow Creek, Saddleback, and other churches and organisations.

Experiment till you find what suits you.

5. How do we get more leaders?

To ensure you always have enough leaders, do advertised training runs from time to time (like my ‘start-up’ friend above)—and build in an apprentice system so that in each group someone is always being trained for leading a group on their own, should that opportunity arise.

Do both things and you’ll always have enough leaders!

6. Should we multiply (or split!) our groups?

There are two main schools of thought on this—with the word ‘split’ sometimes giving people very bad vibes!

Some argue very strongly for creating new groups through the growth and splitting of all groups—so that people join small groups knowing they’re just in their group for a season.

Others take a more relaxed approach and shift the focus from multiplying/splitting the groups to building lasting relationships that tie people into the local church permanently.

Steve Gladen, pastor of small groups at Saddleback Church, takes the second view. In a paragraph headed Relational, not multiplying, Steve says, “Small groups need a simple mission. Too often small group ‘theory’ dictates that groups should be constantly multiplying. These strategies often place too much pressure on an average leader to be a ‘church strategist’ instead of a relationship builder. We help small group leaders relax and use their natural desire to serve in ways that help their group grow closer.”

Then he adds (as I found in the early 80s) that the last thing people who’re forming relationships want to hear is that the ‘fun’ is over and they’re moving into new groups. So on this second view, we increase our number of groups by starting new groups from scratch—rather than by forming them out of existing groups.

The Bible is silent on the subject; so let each church decide for itself because, at the end of the day, it’s what works best for you.

7. How do we maintain Small Group momentum?

To maintain small group momentum we should be as proactive and focused as the friend who took his church from no small groups to four plus groups in 12 months.

In the Sunday welcome and announcements, in the messages and over the cuppa afterwards, and whenever they talked to people, they got the message through that the groups starting weren’t a tack-on or an extra—they were a critical part of the church’s life from that moment on. So just like down on the farm, they reaped what they sowed. And we always do!

The second thing we need to do to maintain small group momentum is to find a small group ‘champion’ who will drive the groups and keep them before the church all the time. In the above example, it was the pastor who drove the groups; but it could be any enthusiastic and competent person. One of the lessons of the last few decades is that without a champion, the best champion we can put forward, we’ll never get far with small groups. Never!

The Sunday I preached for the friend with 100+ small groups, he featured a group at the morning services that had been winning large numbers of people for Christ. It was a wonderful way to remind the church that small groups were the lifeblood of the church—and that every possible person should be in one!

Both the above pastors are practitioners, not theorists—and both are taking their churches with them.

8. Should Small Groups be evangelistic?

We have small groups to grow people to maturity in Christ—and that’s their primary purpose. When they’re done well, they shut the back door of the church.

However, as my friend’s 100+ groups demonstrate with their ‘W’ on ‘Witness’, all groups can also share in the church’s wider evangelistic outreach through people praying together for their friends and organising events that include them. And that’s far more satisfying than just focusing on God and ourselves—because we’re all called to carry out the Great Commission and all called to be Great Commission churches.

If I was back in pastoral ministry, I’d build that ‘W” into our small group life!

9. What about those who don’t join?

In the average church, several groups of people don’t join small groups.

Some don’t join a group initially because they don’t see the need for them. These people tend to be well-organised mature Christians who’ve got their lives in order, their faith issues sorted out, and who’re on top of life and its challenges. But they actually need small groups as much as those whose life and faith is more fragile—because it’s only in close interpersonal relationships that we really learn to empathise with others and produce all the fruits of the Spirit (Rick Warren and Steve Gladen are very strong on this!). But I’d be very patient with these friends who have so much to give, and receive, confident that over time more and more of them would join a group.

Others don’t join a group because special work or home challenges make it very difficult for them to be tied to a group that meets at a particular time. Traditional focused pastoral care will ensure they too grow to full maturity in Christ—so each church needs a first class pastoral care strategy as well as outstanding small groups.

Still others, with demanding ministry responsibilities on top of their family and work commitments, struggle to fit small groups in. So someone on the music team, with a young family and demanding job, may struggle to fit in both a night out for music practice and a small group as well. There’s no rule of thumb here; but are they and others involved in a struggling night service, etc, that should be closed to free them up for small group time? And if that’s not possible in the short term, and others are in the same position, the ‘task’ group, like music, could perhaps take a little longer and incorporate the essence of the four ‘W’s’.

But whatever the situation, if still in pastoral ministry, I’d model the small group dynamic, by being in a small group myself—no matter how busy I was.

10. Purpose driven—or special interest groups?

Churches of reasonable size often have both (purpose driven) small groups and special interest groups (including short-term focused groups on particular subjects)—but each type of group has a different function.

Steve Gladen, Rick Warren’s small group pastor, says that their “small group strategy intentionally deepens the five biblical purposes of fellowship, discipleship, ministry, evangelism, and worship into every group. We are far more concerned about healthy groups than the number of groups. Groupings of people that meet around ‘special interests’ are strategic, but are not groups that are trying to balance the five purposes for healthy individuals and groups.”

He continues, “So, while our greeter’s small groups (in the Greeter’s Ministry) are very important and strategic, those groups don’t generally focus on ‘health’ of the person and group, but on ‘greeting’ people to our campus. You need specialty groups that accomplish individual purposes, but you need small groups to bring ‘health’ to your church.”

Small groups and special interest groups complement each another—they don’t conflict with one another, nor are they alternatives to one another.

11. How good should Small Group leaders be?

The small group leader’s primary task is to help the group grow closer to God, one another, and the pre-Christian friends God lays on their hearts. So leaders don’t try to do everything that happens in the group—they just see that the group’s relational journey becomes more and more meaningful.

Steve Gladen says that their small group ministry ‘strives to be effective, not excellent.’ He reminds us that Ecclesiastes 11.4 says, ‘If you wait for perfect conditions, you will never get anything done’ (NLT). So they ‘help small group leaders relax and use their natural desire to serve in ways that help their group grow closer.’ We should do the same.

Start with the leaders you have and grow them to what you want them to become—like the pastor I mentioned who started small group ministry from scratch.

Your growing leaders are your greatest small group asset.

The Small Group challenge

Wes, there are many other questions people ask about small groups but these are some of the main ones.

Small groups are a challenge—and the busier we become (as we are!) the bigger the challenge. So don’t be discouraged, because many others find them challenging too.

Read these notes carefully and talk about them with your leaders. Let the start-up pastor’s example featured in this Letter guide you as you develop your new small group strategy—and get a champion to drive it, as that pastor drove the strategy in his church. And this time you should win.

May God bless you as you start again—and may all your dreams for your small groups now come true!

Goodbye.

Gordon Miller
Church Growth & Development Consultant

To discuss at leaders meetings

• How are we doing at small groups—and where would we like to be with them by the end of 2010?
• What are the main challenges we face in getting there —and what strategic steps will we now take to ensure we do get there?
• And in light of this Letter, what changes will we now make to the way we do small groups on the day—so we help the people in them get closer to God, one another, and the pre-Christian friends God lays on their hearts?
• What steps will we now also take to give effective pastoral care to those who won’t be in small groups in the near future?

Write the answers to the above questions down, put names against the resulting action points, and record the dates by which each step will be taken. Then monitor progress and adjust your small group and pastoral care strategy as you go.

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Download Issue 17 of the Salvation Army Leadership Letter (PDF, 87KB)